Late Night With Lil B[eauvoir]

Pajama Party Patrick's Potential Profile Picture

Thesis

If you're feeling down, explore the waters! Well, I wasn't exactly feeling down, but I was feeling a little out. This is a month ago now, but I was sorta just floating on - generally happy, but lowkey not really enthused about anything that wasn't my girlfriend, Ros, or Destroyer. Since then, I've been feeling hella wonderful, thanks mostly to some self-reflection and family and friends. But it's also due to the acquisition of a few new identities. These identities are totally worth blogging about:

BASED

Let's start off with a totally fresh mentality - Doing What You Wanna Do. This was originally the mission statement of #METASWAG (and of everyone ever), but I've found it most fanatically, and often adorably, posited by one Lil B, "The Based God."

Now, being Based covers a lot more territory than just doing what you wanna do (though this is a prerequisite), but I cannot at all begin to comprehend it. Basedness is flatout complicated, folks. Maybe the best way to understand Based life is by examining The Based God Himself, Lil B.

I'm going to preemptively ask you, fam, to forgive the following burlesque description. Lil B is an emblem of our times, thus making him the perfect candidate for The Future Of Rap. Simply put, he's a uniquely populist, absurdist (Post-Lil Wayne) West Coast rapper. But he also defines himself in terms of his fanbase - he exists on and through the internet, for the internet. Of the so-called mixtape rappers, he rose to fame and fortune not only through prolificness (3,000 songs in 3 years), but also through his pretty bizarre personality.

He presents a non-normative portrayal of the typical misogynist rapper identity, sometimes referring to himself as a "pretty bitch" and "faggot." I mean, yeah - this is still awful, but at least it's something different. Also, he often compares himself to and temporarily adopts the personalities of wholly dissimilar celebrities, like Miley Cyrus, Mel Gibson, Ellen Degeneres, and most recently, Justin Bieber. His music is largely based on New Age synths, and he released an ambient/rap album that was downright Wrong.

Lil B is Perfect for the future of rap, because he's strange, fascinated with himself and the culture that allows this fascination, and he's Real. Now, authenticity in rap is a pretty dumb discussion, but it's the way that Lil B reveals himself that's worth talking about. In a single mixtape, he declares both "I'm God" and "I'm the Devil," and occupies all sorts of identities in between. He can spend 12 songs pondering the essence of his livelihood in an emo-Drake manner, before pulling a 180 and repeating the "Fuck bitches / Smoke weed" aphorism for a dozen more songs. That he doesn't seem to fully embody any mentality is exciting.

It's this weird dichotomy of self that Lil B has established in his work (in an always playful way) that makes him so fascinating and so personable and so Right for Now. It's also what makes Based Life so appealing - a playground for the exploration of the self's plasticity. Do what you wanna do, whoever you are.

Swag.

FEMINIST

Well, I'll tell ya, it's been some time before I've felt so jazzed about something like this. Or over which I've been so willing to subject myself to hours of reading. But it's paying off... I'm figuring stuff out about Me! Now, what I'm about to say is not intended to be a misappropriation of feminism as religion, but rather an example of how substantial feminism can be as a practiced ideology.

Feminism contains some of the core precepts of some Western religions (without the terrible misogyny), or happily offers better alternatives. It encourages - through its assertion of personal, political, and sexual equality - a lifestyle of deliberate consideration for oneself and (O)thers. In its supposition that one's gender is mutable, as is one's identity, it is the basis of helpful and affirmative existential evaluation. So, it gives us the Golden Rule, with an added element of metaphysicality. Its practice means self-improvement, in that one seeks further understanding of oneself and (O)thers, and hopes to inspire a positive change in (or deconstruction of) society.

This is a description of a watered-down, depoliticized, and desexualized feminism. Of course, it's about a lot more than all this writing would suggest, but again, I'm just trying to get at how a feminist identity has proved fruitful for me as a perspective, not giving you a view of the fundamental concepts of feminism. It's enlightening and humanist. And the more radical you get, the more interesting it all becomes.

Really the reason for all this hellabaloo is my History Of Feminist Theory course, which has inspired more thought than I've known what to do with. Hella exciting!

This also explains my recent infatuation with sexuality and power dynamics, and why I started that hour long discussion at 3 AM in Noodles about the dissolution of gender. Sorry, y'all - I couldn't help myself! Anyway, I think it was okay, because we were having some trill arguments! Illuminating! Besides, being a Based Feminist means doing what you wanna do. Swag.

So...

Less heady stuff

Drew and I watched the first Wayne's World movie on Saturday night (unawares that it served as the cold open for "SNL" later that night - what a crazy coincidence). It was excellent! Earlier that night, with the equipment, guidance, and expertise of Bron, we set out to shoot a short film in the freezing cold. We slipped and fell more often than we captured adequate footage, but I must say that the experience was happy and memorable. Since then, it's been mostly reading and writing, with all sorts of stresses and crazies going on. Despite this, I'm wearing a big smile.

Anyway, it's really late, and I just celebrated a full day of hard work and hard-earned fun. The reason for both?

Happy 20th Birthday, Rachel

My girlfriend of more than a year has finally shed the title of teenager, and thus has escaped being the subject of "Teenage Dream." Luckily, the song still rocks. And so does she! I managed to procure some groovy gifts:

> An over-the-top cute "coupon" book

> A romantic mix CD, assembled from the perspective of myself as a middle-schooler

> One pair of turquoise-looking earrings from Thailand
> The best birthday card ever made for anybody ever

To celebrate, we (with the gang, of course) went to Ami for some 30%-off sushi. Yummy! I ate some 007 rolls and spicy California rolls (the pun in Ros' blog just reoccurred to me for probably the fifth time). They tasted great! We followed our dinner with a movie - Steel Magnolias. This is a favorite of Rachel's, and nearly everyone in the room was moved to tears (or moved to another room, as was Bron's case). It seemed a bit melodramatic to me, but I was for the most part nose-deep in some class readings. Nevertheless, Dolly Parton charmed my socks off.

Conclusions

A good day.

Bonus List Of People To Whom I Owe Stuff

~~~~~~

HAYLEY - A LETTER

JAY - $5

RZA - A FONECALL

LANIE - A SKYPE SESH

CAMPUSWALK - SECURITY DEPOSIT

Bow Chicka Wow Wow & The Bonus Post

This would definitely be my desktop...

... If it weren't for this ridiculous screenshot of Clova

from G-Side's new "Inner Circle" video.

Thesis

Everyone loves bonus posts! Two posts in one night! Above is evidence of one of the many joys of a bonus post, like double the usual amount of pictures to kick off our thought process for the post.

Yes, the blog is influenced by the image at the beginning of every post (sink your brain teeth into the connection between the above images and the content of this post). Also coming into play is whatever music happens to be playing while I'm writing.

At present, the music is Mike Posner and Lil Wayne's "Bow Chicka Wow Wow." It's a deliriously catchy and harmless song. The production, musical arrangement, and lyrical content are operating in perfect harmony to create a Cute Radio Song. And what's better - or more listenable - than a Cute Radio Song? Nothing! It's times like these when I sometimes feel that a harmless song is as powerful and useful as a harmful song.

Harmful Songs

You know, like stuff that's abrasive or challenging. The Psychic Paramount (what I'm now listening to) is abrasive in its energy and drive. It's powerhouse noise rock, propellant and exciting. Except, now that I think of it, this album isn't very harmful. And it's certainly not challenging. Except to your neck - as it does promote head-banging. Um.

Anyway, #METASWAG is Not A Music Blog.

Motivation

But that begs the question, What is #METASWAG all about? In a confluence of readings (de Beauvoir, Butler, some evolutionary theory stuff, and the effect of realism on literature), my mind has become super preoccupied with the nature of my reality and purpose. Heady stuff for head-banging, no?

Check it out: if life itself has no purpose (which for all purposes, it doesn't really really), what purpose does blogging serve? This isn't a nihilist rant. I'm seriously feeling cheery, fam. And the life not mattering thing - that's not true. Like, I don't really believe that, I just needed to throw out an extreme with which to contrast the total silliness of blogging. Because like, Life is Good because you can form connections with other Human Beings and have Experiences that Mean Something. Okay, the meaning is hella tricky, but the experiences themselves are worthwhile (I would argue, if arguing weren't so tiring).

Oh yeah, blogging. So - blogging is tired, too. And how can it Mean Something? It's the result of a culture of self-indulgence that allows for us to think our writing (life) is worthwhile. A similar shift took place centuries ago, when the individual first became important enough to write about as an individual - Kant, Enlightenment, the birth of the Novel, swag, etc.

I guess the origins and meanings aren't really that important, because it's just psuedo-intellectual mumbling. What I'm really trying to get at is The Thesis behind #METASWAG. Because when I made that list of shout outs to friends' blogs, I noticed that all of their blogs were written with some expressed goal in mind. To communicate desires, to share recipes, to exhibit creative output, to tell stories - all of these things are Cool and Interesting.

#METASWAG is, among the blogosphere of my friends, distinctly without a Thesis. I dreamed it up as some sort of Space for my low and highbrow musings on daily happenings. Or maybe as a place for lists. Here, I could even demonstrate that I like music as diverse as noise, Southern rap, and black metal (thus proving my Hipsterdom). I'd be able to communicate with a fictional set of readers.

When I first began, I was so convinced that I was shouting into the void that I treated the blog more as a diary than a column. How things have changed, and delusions of grandeur have set in.

But what's the point?

Well, the point here seems to be that #METASWAG (like all blogs?) is pointless. Without direction. There are some overarching trends - lists, music, rambling - but there are no ends. Or none in sight. A possible point is that I get to exorcise my demons in a place where people can choose to witness the spectacle or not. Because I already have valuable friends to take care of the heavy stuff, I can dump the less important Stuff of my mind onto the Internet. And if people read it, I get to feel Doubly Accomplished.

SWAG

Feeling Based. Feeling like I accomplished something just now.

To keep this blog exciting for me, I might try out some more lists (like, the really big ones - BEST MOVIES EVER, BEST ALBUMS EVER - that sort of thing). Or maybe incorporate record and movie reviews more regularly. I guess that would be a Thesis. A directive.

For now, the directive is keeping my swag on.

Conclusions

It's hard not to capitalize a lot of Nouns when you're reading 18th century writing. Though we've essentially had two snow days in a row on the IU campus, I've managed to sleep in for neither. To reward myself for this lack of sleep, I'm going to sleep-in tomorrow.

And that, fam, is cause for (sleepy) celebration.

Go to sleep

&

Think about This:

Those are human beings;

Isn't That silly?

Dream

Shout Outs & Snow Days

One last look at the old header. How it will be missed, I do not know.

Thesis

Winter is the cruelest season (thanks, TS). Though, if you look out my window right now, the ice-covered branches in the courtyard resemble giant spiderwebs lined with dew. Today is the first anniversary of my and Rachel's relationship! Dating, fam. We celebrated with some pizza (old couples are allowed to indulge on cravings - who needs reservations?). Of course, over the year there have been a few reservations, but you're looking at a healthy and dedicated relationship at present - and future, one (I) would would hope. And it goes on and on and on, and it goes on and on and on. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Sometimes
I throw my hands up in the air. It was a splendid anniversary, fam -

> Mother Bear's
> Freaks & Geeks

Well, sure, it doesn't sound like much. You should've been there, though!

What's Going On

Well, it's been snowing and icing and raining and everything in between. A lot. Classes have been cancelled. The sidewalks are treacherous. It's a veritable winter wonderland out there! I've been digging it, insomuch as smiling in the cold is digging. I've managed to capitalize on these extra hours by watching movies and reading a lot.

Also, I'm listening to way too much music for my own good.

2011 (in descending order of greatness):

Destroyer, Earth, James Blake, G-Side, Fergus & Geronimo, Lil B "The Based God," Akron/Family, Burzum, Smith Westerns, Braids, Minutiae, Yuck, Iron & Wine

Other Things: My recovery from a dastardly sinus infection. DISJOINTED THOUGHTS right now.

I've also discovered that I have a lot of extracurricular reading with which to keep up, which is to say: FAM! You're all blogging on the regular now!

Required Reading

> Indiana Rock On A California Roll by RZA

The joys and difficulties of a Hoosierlicious babe becoming a California Gurl. It's undeniable, and sometimes includes pictures of me.

> Tarsty by Will & Fran

Two gay dudes set out to find the perfect recipe for vegan mac 'n cheese. Hilarity ensues.

> Across The Pond by Lanie

The Life and Strange surprizing Adventures of an American ex-pat in London. Includes comical illustrations and witty writing.

> Cambron's by Cambron

Personal and political cartoons and ruminations from a bearded Telecom major.

> The Depths by Bubbz

The striking words of a published poet and quadruplet. Stuff has the roll and swag of Cormac McCarthy's prose.

> Waffelhaus by Stoner

The snarky work of an aspiring Jezebel writer. Mostly examines stuff she hates.

REDESIGN

#METASWAG looks totally different. Fear not, the writing will remain sloppy.

Conclusions

I should probably pack up. I still have to read Jean Toomer's Cane and Watt's essay on "Realism and the Novel Form." What can ya do? Thanks for reading, y'all.

"I Owe Hayley A Letter"

SONIC BOOM

is Supposedly

on the Forum

& Yet & Yet

it's hard to believe he Is

Whether Or not

He Is

TOMBOY approaches

like a Hurricane

or a Revolution

Drone On and on

Go